Murder- Dr. Ethan Schmidt, a college professor at Delta State University, was shot in his own office on Sept. 9. Unlike most shootings, Dr. Schmidt was the only victim and the only one threatened directly by the killer. The killer was more like an assassin of sorts, in that he didn’t go crazy and try to murder his whole class, but rather he took out one target. Now here’s the scary part for all the Delta State students: He didn’t get caught. Will there be another victim? Only time will tell.

Terrorists or Tourists?- The Egyptian police seem to have trouble distinguishing between terrorists and tourists, because on Sept. 12, they shot at a truck full of Mexican tourists. The Egyptian government is still struggling to identify all the victims of the attack by the Egyptians, who were hunting militants in the Western Desert. The Mexicans had no permit for their tour, nor did they have a certified tour truck. In addition, they were in a restricted area, specifically because of a large rebel presence. Either way, it was a tragic mishap that will no doubt be felt for a while yet to come.

Patricide- The crime of patricide (the killing of one’s own father) has long been considered one of the worst crimes a person can commit. In the Roman Empire the punishment for such a crime was, at one point in time, to be tied up in a bag with a monkey, a snake, and a chicken and then thrown into the Tiber River. If by some miracle, you were to survive this horrific experience, you’d be promptly killed. Now, the punishment in our country, although not as extreme thanks to our constitution, is still the same as murder. If it’s murder in the first degree, the punishment could very well be death. Cameron and Christopher Ervin tried to murder their parents on Sept. 5, but failed after trying to beat them to death. The father, Zachary, held them off long enough for his wife Yvonne to call the police. The two lads were going to burn down the house as well but were apprehended before that could happen. No motive has been discovered, but the Ervins’ father, mother, and house survived.

A sour liquor- What do you use hand sanitizer for? Is it, maybe, sanitizing your hands? No! It’s for drinking. Everybody knows that. Six-year-old Naijah Russell swallowed a few squirts of some tasty strawberry scented hand sanitizer and boom! She was rolling drunk. Her words slurred and steps staggered. She was hurried down to the local hospital for some treatment. She turned out to be fine, but her blood alcohol level was .179, twice the legal limit for drunk adults. She drank it because it tasted good. What lesson can we learn from this? Next time you buy Purell, buy it unflavored.

She’s back- Kim Davis, the woman that wouldn’t give marriage licenses to gay people, came back to work on Sept. 14 after being in jail for five days. Did she learn her lesson? Nope. However, she did allow her deputies to give out said licenses as long as her name was omitted from the official documents. In the end, the whole thing was pretty much useless because her refusals did pretty much nothing.

GOP wisdom- With all the debates going on recently, there’s one thing that really stands out. Every debate is ridiculous. This isn’t a high school speech and debate tournament, we don’t need to debate topics that don’t have any relevance to real life. President Obama decided to do something about it, kindly giving the candidates some advice about debating. “There’s nothing particularly patriotic or American about talking down America, especially when we stand as one of the few sources of economic strength in the world,” our president said to the candidates. Sometimes you need help debating, even when you’re a politician and the future president of our country.