Boys Will Be Boys

I’m going to cross over into Sunflower Rangel’s world of Modern Feminism for a moment here and discuss the gender-biased defense of “boys will be boys.” As many of you know, earlier last month, a leaked Access Hollywood tape showed presidential candidate Donald Trump, who has the body of an abnormally shaped, orange peanut M&M, using extremely misogynistic language as he glorified acts of sexual assault. Many people said they were shocked and outraged by Trump’s comments. For the record, if you were one of those people, you were clearly living under a rock this whole election with your roommates Patrick Star and every other “flabbergasted” leader in the Republican party. While I was appalled by Trump’s remarks, my main complaint lies with the arguments Trump supporters put in defense of his words. “Well, boys will be boys” is what I heard all day long on the news. First of all, “boys will be boys” is more outdated than that food stinking up your fridge you can’t seem to find. In this instance, and in any other, we as a society can’t cite somebody’s gender as an excuse for their heinous actions. When crimes are committed we need to call it like it is. Guys aren’t just sexually-charged, rowdy heathens who love yelling “FOOTBALL!” all the time. So don’t label an entire gender as such. In today’s world, dudes enjoy sipping on glasses of fine wine and watching ‘Devil Wears Prada.’ Let us embrace this. Our society has come too far and I have listened to too many Ingrid Michaelson songs to revert back to an era when guys would get punched in the face for listening to Ingrid Michaelson songs. Let’s keep the ball rolling forward, not backward.

Everybody’s Working for the Weekends

Well, we have arrived in November and it is safe say the start of the school year has officially ended. Teachers have stopped letting us play the name game or bingo mixers for half of class and exams and legitimate assignments have taken their place. Take a look and listen around you: A kid down the hall is cussing about something on his math test that “the teacher didn’t put on the study guide!” A girl to your left is frantically copying down her disciplined friend’s Spanish homework, and there’s a full I.B. student curled up against the wall in the fetal position muttering something about “the extended essay! Harvard! FUTURE!” Yup, the year is in full swing. Like Cleveland students at a homecoming dance, we are all getting our grind on, academically speaking, of course. It is during this time of the year that the student’s mindset of “I was getting kind of bored of summer, I’m actually sort of excited for the school year,” has already switched back to “O.K. this was nice while it lasted, how long until we’re done?” When that mindset kicks in, I always think of the 1981 rock song, “Working for the Weekend” by Loverboy. When the singer says, “Everybody’s working for the weekend,” he is referring to the fact that everybody works and stresses all week just so they can have a good time on the weekend. If you couldn’t tell by the line later on in the chorus, “Everybody’s going off the deep end,” this is not a good way to spend your life. Let’s do the math. If you are only living for two days out of the week, Friday and Saturday–we won’t count Sunday because the Sunday blues can be worse than Monday–that means you are only enjoying 29 percent of your life. That is a terrible percentage! That kid who was mad about the study guide for his math test got a 75 percent and he nearly had a mental breakdown. These are the only days we get, so we shouldn’t only be excited for two-sevenths of them. If Drake can go up at the club on a Tuesday, then you should be able to find some joy on a Tuesday, too. Throughout the week, look for little pleasures and plan to do fun things between the school work. Whatever you do, don’t bank all you’ve got on the weekend. Remember that movie you waited impatiently for all year that was just a big disappointment? Some weekends can turn out the same way. The school year can get challenging, but don’t fight against the wave–that will only make things harder. Instead, ride with the wave. In “Harry Potter: The Sorcerer’s Stone,” what does Hermione say is the only way to break free from the suffocating Devil’s Snare? Just Relax! The same goes for school. Don’t panic and squirm like Ron. Just relax! Say it’s all right, have a good time, because it’s all right, no matter what day of the week it is. Consider this rule number one of Conor’s Declassified School Survival Guide: Don’t work for the weekends.

Kids at the SATs

This is the second time I have used Conor’s Complaints ink space to write about my dissatisfaction with the SAT, so if you couldn’t already tell, I do not care much for the whole test-taking process. I will make this rant short and sweet: If you show up to the SAT wearing a sweater from a prestigious university such as Stanford, or any Ivy League school, you are not better than everybody else in the room like your cocky demeanor suggests. You’re like that dude at the gym who takes his shirt off for no reason. Stop “academically-flexing” on everybody.